Poems from Poetry Workshop

Here are two poems: the first one is the original, which is basically as I wrote it when I wrote it, and the second was the final revision of it for Lea Graham's Poetry Workshop that used the structure of "i am new york" by Jane Cortez.

Rhythmic Rant

Here is an order of stupidity and mediocrity

with a heap indulgences on the side

chicken wings and salty fries

thick bacon upon turkey upon ham upon beef

fast cars and diamond rings that are slowly

but spontaneously (which doesn’t mean immediately,

scientifically speaking) turning into graphite

and were mined by minors

in a country many probably can’t place on a map

but who cares about that?

As long as we’ve got our purified water

shipped over salty oceans, miles and gallons

of oil, pulled up from countries in another part

of the world map, where the names aren’t familiar

to anyone. And nobody cares what they’re called

as long as our cars still drive fast

and we don’t have to pay that much for the speed

that rush, to get everywhere, and to taste

what you think is healthy and high-class

yet purity doesn’t mean it’s good for you

pious bishops in Brazil say it’s okay to kill

a 9-year-old girl raped by her step father

just so the twin fetuses can come to term

because “every life is precious”

and distilled water would wipe

out your electrolytes

but that’s okay because we’ve got Gatorade

to fill you up on those busy days

when you sit on your ass and watch reality TV

maybe check a few emails, Facebook, Twitter

and type up some reports

report on numbers and figures that stopped meaning

anything, and you can’t figure out if they should

since you’ve forgotten anything you ever learned

in statistics at least, and probably history

and biology as well. Evolution’s just a theory

as are atoms and gravity

who needs them anyway? Science won’t save you

never mind medicine and agriculture

advancement that feeds our hungry mouths

and cleans our water so the tap is safe

creating plastics, vaccinations, building houses

and the polyester blend in your

designer threads, synthetics for your Nike treads

sewn by children who won’t get the chance

to ever learn about everything you forget.

I Am America

i am america

with my soggy-thin bible paper brain

my rotting teeth my

ashtray of lottery tickets and bubblegum

stuck to converse, nike, air force ones

fighting war overseas

finger pointing at supposed haters of freedom

my freedom to expose my legs

look at my tan lines fading

i am america in need of more

artificial sun, hair color, flavoring

i conquer nature by cutting it down

and forgetting that I once was part of it my birthplace

my pesticide sprayed waves of grain

my bare topped mined purple mountain majesty

these are my riches between my thighs of

sparkling ocean and off-shore drilling

i answer to no one

i am america

of the brand names and gas guzzlers

give me my melting pot of flesh

my marquee of false nipples

my storefront of ED drugs

in my nose of carbon emissions

in my worldblind eyes

in my ear of reality tv bitch fights

i eat twinkies and diet coke

i am america

never change never sleep never budge

my shoes are made in china

corpses grow where my hand reaches

look i shine with cells phones with diamonds

my nickname is so sue-me

take my face of botox and rogain

my star spangled banner of whoppers

take my beer can high ways

my congested cities and sinuses

and approach me through seaports

approach me through border fences

approach me through my spare tire

my blackened lungs my

nicotine craved pleas approach me

through my online profile

half fiction half documentary

massage me with your analgesic sweat

salute hot blacktops and concrete

of my synthetic plastic skin

face up knees down piss

into the clammy insincerity of our handshake

i am america

my faith based friend

my indulgent comrade

legal immigrants

break laws with me